My life is so different here in Mexico, that it is hard to explain. Both the little and the big changes are making this trip both challenging and exciting, and i have only been here a week. I am excited to see how God continues to challenge me in the weeks and months to come.
It feels a lot like when i went to training camp before Nepal. There they told us that in order to be fully prepared for our trip, we had to give up comfort and control. Here it is the same, i am still giving up comfort and control, but in different ways than i did in that hay field 2 years ago.
Giving up the little things makes me less comfortable. I can't sing in the shower because if the water gets in my mouth, i will get even sicker. I can't put my clothes in the dryer because dryers don't exist here. I have to sleep with a fan because of the heat. And instead of searching for a quiet place where i can think and be alone, i am provided that at least half the day every day because my family is gone at school or work.
-- Not all of these things are bad!!! God is using them to stretch me, and i appreciate it. I realize that this trip is not going to be easy. A lot of my friends think i'm down here on vacation, HA!!! I AM having fun!!! Don't get me wrong!!! I am having the time of my life, but i must constantly pray and ask God for strength that the little things don't build up to the point that i crack.
The big things are an even harder challenge, but at the same time the most emotionally and spiritually rewarding. One big thing is that i am CONSTANTLY surrounded by people that genuinely care!!! At home i have my family and close friends, but here, when i'm sick, people i barely know are doing everything possible to make me comfortable!!! It is such a blessing that i am constantly fighting back tears of gratitude. The biggest thing however, i have not yet decided if it is a blessing or a curse. The biggest thing is the cultural independence from time. My days feel like dreams because i wake up at a different time than at home, eat at a different time than at home, and in between, never know what time it is!!! Here, if you want to know the time you had better have a cell phone because i still have yet to see a clock out in public. These people go about their day using their routine as their time. If they are late, it doesn't matter, and if they are early, it's weird. This is hard for me to grasp because since NOE is on vacation...i have no routine! My plans are made moment by moment. Those of you that know me know that i thrive on structure and order. I need to know where to be, at what time, and then i do it. Here that is impossible. One, because i always have an escort to wherever i am going, so if the escort is late, i am late. And two, because i am usually informed of a plan at the last minute and often have little time to prepare.
-- I realize that this is all a test from God. It is showing me that even though i think i have control over what i do day to day, i really don't!!! He controls every day, every hour, every second, and i am but the character he chose to live this life. Therefore i am choosing to live it to the fullest!!! To embrace this crazy new life that is before me and to go into it full throttle, knowing that God knows what is going to happen, and that is all that matters.
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